Unfortunately, due to personal constraints our voice actor for Rainbow Dash
was temporarily unable to return for his role in this episode.
To alleviate this we had auditions for a temporary voice for the role.
Our usual voice for Rainbow should return for our next episode, but for today
Rainbow Dash will be performed by the vocal talents of Stormy Pride.
Upon receiving feedback, we have also added subtitles to Fluttershy's lines until we
can achieve higher quality.
Applejack: Hot damn, Big Mac!
That new fancy manure y'all used for our trees this year's made the best damn crop I've seen in along time.
Where’d y’all say you found them again?
Big Mac: Uh... Fluttershy?
Applejack: Uh-huh... Right.
Well... Don’t think it makes up for y’all gettin’ hurt right before harvestin’ season.
Although... I can just take your pay for myself!
Heh... I do all your work and I reap them sweet, sweet benefits.
Big Mac: Oh come on sis!
Even you can’t buck that many trees.
Also, we’re family. How does takin’ my pay make a difference?
Applejack: Well, one: That's a lie and y’all know it.
I'll buck these trees so hard, Mom and Dad’ll raise from their graves.
And two: Less money for you to spend on them weird products y’all like ta buy from the paper.
Big Mac: Uh... But the mares like me more with them.
Applejack: Huh... Looking back on it...
I might’ve right shittered myself...
Hey!
(This cameraman sucks.)
Rainbow: COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWS!
(Mass hysteria! WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE?!)
*CRASH*
Pinkie: Are the dead rising from their graves to answer my prayers?!
Ooooh! My little cow friends are coming to visit!
This is like band camp all over again!
Applejack: It’s a kid show, ya idjit!
(Go, go, Cotton Eye Joe!)
Pinkie: You kill that cow, Cowgirl!
*CRACK*
(Murder is fun.)
DEATH TO THE NON-PONIES!
Mayor Mare: Huh... Well that was eventful and out of nowhere.
Well, since Applejack just saved the town thousands in damage costs,
how about we spend this entire month's budget to throw her a party and get trashed?
Pinkie: Did somepony say PARTY?!
I’ve got the booze!
(That's a LOTTA PAPERS.)
Twilight: Alright you lot! I drew the short straw so I’ve gotta deliver this fucking speech.
So Apple- Rainbow: OH HEY A PONDIUM!
I could practice my Wonderbolt acceptance speech with this!
*Ahem* Hello friends, family, and that one piece of dust floating behind that guy over there.
I am the glorious Rainbow Dash, and I would like to say-
OH LOOK A BIRD!
Twilight: Goddamnit! I thought she’d be my ticket out of this shit!
As I was saying- Mayor Mare: Twilight...
You can go now.
Twilight: I'm out, fuckers!
Mayor Mare: Well... We spent all the money on alcohol,
so with whatever scraps there were left... I’m happy to present plastic trophy painted gold...
To Applejack!
son of a bitch not this shit again hmm you know I might be three sheets to
the wind but I'm pretty sure this thing is plastic way to show your appreciation
guys well I guess I can't use it as a doorstop I think she likes it you know
this town might be an even bigger bag of crazy than that fucking moon chick from
Magic School but I gotta hand it to them they sure know how to throw a good
alcoholic party out of all the ponies in this town I would have thought you would
have had the highest tolerance out the jack are you still drunk from the party
what say what now oh hey hi sugar cube I think my wares are in the back for y'all
look at what back website so what the hell does sugar cube mean this is some
kind of fucking racist thing are you accusing me of being a fucking sugar
apple jack the fuck is going on well mister if y'all don't want to buy I'm
gonna keep kicking this here tree damn it I really wish these bastards were so
slippery feels like I'm hitting nothing I can't
believe I'm fucking saying this outfit jack but do you need help with whatever
the crap this is for your information it's called Apple buck season don't care
fuck I'm only here to find out where that cider from the party came from
living a few a lot I'm sorry to see you watch list your drinks now listen here
all four if y'all weird the color twilight's I can hand all these trees
find and when its end done all of Big Macs money will be my extra profits all
I wanted was buy some stupid alcohol right you know just kind of find
something I don't know oh it's rooms are finally gonna come
true I look physical Jack what's that I didn't catch that
what do y'all want sugar cube what I wanted was for you to get up on their
kid phone and via pretend to fall on one side then I can drop a big rock on the
other side and low chance of a year then I can catch you
and look like a hair and get everyone to love me even moving they already do now
ha hell that get up here oh yeah if you can't keep looking drunk
even Solis you was a tit clones welcome home party and they will really sell
you're in danger sorry what was that about selling something you want apples
it's a lot of Apple down there Apple bad now pinky we need to leave for
a few days to attend a hearing comes out baby now bakery after a racial stuff we
were to control it the best idea who knew god damn dirty government trying to
keep us hard-working earth ponies down anyway pinky just watched the store and
for the love of Equestria don't have a repeat of last time you're cleaning goo
out of the cupboard for weeks I've got it all under control
this time I have Applejack here to stabilize the spell right Applejack
I'm a Western see she's totally fine alright Applejack this is gonna be
really easy all you've got to do is help me mix these ingredients together why
can't you do the mixing again because silly I have to read spell can't do both
at once now first thing we need are the tears the smallest of foals so the tears
huh how the hell does Oh she must mean salt well it's always
saying how the tears spikes crabs are just salt next up for the bodily fluids
of any creature yellow are the better lemons should be yellow enough all right
last ingredient the scum of the earth hmm this one's gotta be tricky scum of
the earth hey yeah I know exactly what this one is
Wow you found something already you're good it's actually someone has speakable
hearts if you are off it fuck worms ha ha you said it you've jumped pony you
now let's summon ourselves a scary creature from the middle world
for fuck's sake pinkie what the do fucking do
the creature was unclean those are the tears of fools why didn't you get the
tears of 400 Jack can't you see any thank you kidding geese pennies together
for Torelli without things he'll give it come on you would have been so much
easier if you had just killed a few as an example like I suggested there are so
many things wrong with that statement I don't even know where to begin
I'm too tired for this shit I can't even remember why I agreed to do this tell
her the truth it's the right thing to do did you so hung over she will probably
not even remember it and if she doesn't remember it you can just knock her out
and force her to forget are you asked you when you a talkative party the other
night I faked it you am more likely to get you
helping me to treat him what was that I couldn't hear you all these damn voices
in my head it allowed can't understand a word
they're saying without southern - we're screwed if we
stay here with these idiots all in favor running as fast as our
little legs can take us yeah I told you you should have killed a few alright
object I am done with cleaning up your shit alright I'm cutting right to the
fucking chase here you are way too fucking hungover to be doing anything
right now so I don't exactly give two shits about what you think about the
situation you need help huh is that so well then take a gander at
that i bucked all them apples all by myself so y'all can take your help and
shove it super-sized payday here I come uh how about he take a look over there
fuck
applejack you're damn idiot what are y'all doing wait ha no I'm the goddamn
ghost of apples past a course on your pocket idiot
yo dad what do you want what I want is for my daughter to relish it being in
Egypt you know all these friends now you want to know what friends are good for
free labor y'all are spending so much time trying
to do things yourself to make that extra cash if we're gone how I taught you to
exploit others now sit yourself straight and get back out there and make me proud
until I paint want to stop raising the dead oh look who decided to wake up now
for fuck's sake Alba Jack I want to have some cider and to stop cleaning up the
fucking messes you leave behind all the time so what will it take to get both of
those things done I think I might have just the idea dear Princess Celestia
this past week has been absolute shit show of idiocy for one of my friends
Alba jack she's only cause bones for most of us
here in town and frankly I feel like some jail time should be in order
however he does seem to have some kind of moral compass you know helping us
save the town from certain destruction so I guess I kind of said swing straight
anyways the point of this letter was to send you a few bottles of Apple Jacks
stronger cider I omit Lego can make one hell of a drink hope you don't give
yourself alcohol poisoning your faithful student Twilight Sparkle time to get
blasted
darling
No
darling