Hello, bros.
It's time for an update vlog.
I've been holding out on you.
I've been waiting to do this
Cause I thought a year review was in good time for the holidays to do
ummmmm
It's been quite the year. I don't know if you've noticed
it's probably been the most insane year of my life
literally so many things just got completely switched up side down
lost a lot of friends lost a lot of... a lot of things
but I'm looking back on 2017 and it doesn't feel negative
it doesn't feel like I'm necessarily a bad thing
and I will try and explain why
at around this time last year
I made a video saying I was gonna delete my channel
at 50 million
we're at 58 million right now, by the way, thank you very much
I know you're gonna think I'm joking right now
but I'm gonna delete my channel
I swear to you
at 50 million subs, when we hit 50 million
huge landmark coming up
huge deal, never been done before, no one's even close
I am deleting my channel
so dramatic, hehehe
f*cking assh*le (trying not to get demonetized)
I'm gonna delete my channel at 60 million, guys
I promise, it's definitely going to happen
um that was sort of a joke
but at the same time, I didn't feel like that was necessarily the case
I really felt like I wanted to delete my channel
uh, because I was so stuck
in between al these business side of youtube
you didn't see
a fraction of it, but
for me, to do youtube every single day
upload daily videos, and still be
going on trips for all these different events, uh
going on trips for business stuff
uh, having calls every single day
talking about, you know, revelmode and all these things
I was working on
and working on Scare Pewdiepie
being away for a month
I was so BURNED out
and I know, boohoo me, right?
I put myself in that situation
but I realized: "this is not.. whehehehhh..
I'm stuck here!"
and I- this is not what I want
I just wanna make videos!
wheheh- what the hell happened?
I literally went through like,
an ACTUAL mental breakdown
it just got too much for me
and I think I have a really strong mental ehh- psyche, like
I can handle more shit than most people
I- I feel confident saying that
but it really got to me at a point, and
and I'm not tryna get brown- like
euhbleuh points, like
I- that's not the case
so, when all this stuff happened
in February, when all the stuff about me
being a Nazi came out
some things of it was awful
the fact that season two of Scare Pewdiepie got canceled,
just sucked, I don't... ehh
and in retrospect, it still doesn't make any sense to me
so many people worked on that show
it's, it's, it's really
it's a shame for everyone
that involved, and I'm REALLY sorry for everyone involved
uhhhh
but it also got me out of all these things
that I didn't even enjoy working on, at the time
I was so fed up with it so..
it was sort of a blessing in disguise
and, and this year in general
the main thing throughout all these bad things happening
I regained SO much support from you guys
uhhh, and it's something that I never thought I would get back
I had sorta given up on the idea that my fans were really gonna
have this commu- have this sense of community again
and, uh
you know, for all these bad things, to trade that,
I would take it, i- it's just been amazing
then, the AdPocalypse happened
oh boy
and I vowed to go family friendly
that worked out GREAT, didn't it?
to be honest, the- when the AdPocalypse happened,
I did get hit REALLY hard,
it was a time of panic, 'cause all the sudden
all of your videos are- you're not getting any income
with the- all the wall street stuff happening
my CPM, which is, like, my average income-thing
dropped, because I was kicked out of- um
youtube, uhhhhhhhh
what is it called?
their special ad-program or whatever
but then I realized, hey
I can literally just put one extra midrole in the video
and it doesn't make any difference, like, I actually don't lose anything
and, uh, so I started doing that, as a way to, like,
you know what, FU, Wall Street, you're not gonna make me
go down, you know?
uh, it's not like I NEED the money, it was more like, uh
I wanna show them that this is not gonna affect me in any way
so in case you're wondering why there's a midrole,
there you go!
umm, at the end of the day, I used to have an office
I used to have a bunch of people working for me,
uhhhhhhhhhhh, but I also realized
I didn't want that
I used to have, like, a secretary,
helping me get coffee and, like I-
I don't really feel comfortable letting other people do stuff for me
it really wasn't what I wanted at all
so I just, panicked, I got super sick
like, the worst sickness of my life
and, I decided to- hey, I can just record from this place
it's so much more convenient,
I don't have to have other people in the other room when I record,
uh, this is how I started making videos, in this room
and, uh, that's how I wanna keep- I wanna keep it simple
I would always say like "oh, uh,
youtube isn't the best, because you get just me and it's not me and a producer and a writer"
but how do all these people help in me,
do all this stuff and it
really felt like I was getting against what I was so
spoken about before
so I got really sick, and then Jake Paul stuff came out,
and it was like the best- that was like the best thing
that could- that could happen
because, I fi- I had something to just make a video of right away
when I was away
which is always nice
and this is when I decided: "I'm gonna grow a beard"
Is Keemstar tryna roast my beard?
I made a video called: "I'm tired of trying"
where I basically talked that- I really
used to be very focused on trends, I used to be very focused on, like,
how well a video did, that would take up a lot of my mindspace, and it
I think most youtubers think like that
I realized, I don't wanna
I wouldn't wanna shape my channel that way, I
I wanna do what I wanna do,
I wanna make the videos that I enjoy making,
and, uhhh
that has been my mindset for the past couple months, and it's just turned out SO much better, you know
whether it's me,
talking about something that I enjoy, like whiskey
that, for me, has just been really fun
I've been enjoying just the-
sharing stuff that I like, and
I think you guys have as well and it's been really fun to,
and it's such a better way of making videos
maybe it doesn't get as many views, but it's more fun! and
I would rather watch someone talk about stuff that they like,
than fucking play a game that they don't really enjoy
I started doing these
L-LWIAY videos where I react to your reddit stuff and that was just the best idea ever
I know it's like, a meme, that it's not original content
and it's- or whatever, but
it really sh- came back the
the sorta community on the channel
uhhh, seeing your humor
and my humor sorta collide into different type of memes
it's just so cool and so fun
and uh
I love it so much, I love that we fi- we have a community on this channel
rather than just
me just doing random bullshit, playing random games
uhh, I'm really proud of that, and I'm really proud of that we are at this point, where we are
and it really- thanks to everyone for posting in these
I started doing you laugh you lose-es
which was also the kind of thing people didn't like in the beginning, they
were like, what are you, just looking at other people's clip, what are you, Ray William Johnson? OH
JESUS WHAT THE FUCK
I enjoyed it, it was just like, I enjoyed making them, they were
fun, I love laughing at these stupid clips!
so why shouldn't I make them?
s- and I'm really glad I kept doing them because I think you guys actually really like them too
ohhhhhhhhh man
and I started streaming, 'cause I was really into pubg and
I dont think I-
before, I was so pre-occupied with youtube I had literally no other intrest
it was youtube, or nothing
it was all that was in my head, 24/7 a day so I allowed myself to enjoy other things
and actually playing games again on my spare time
that's why I enjoyed streaming so much
this is the day before the slip-up
I hate how- it's so fucking unfair, dude
shoot me
where is this nibba?
oh my god
FUCK YOU
then, the slip-up happened, and, uhhhhhhh
definitely, you know, once a year, not even worth, once every ten years, not
even, but like twice a year? you fcking idiot
uhhhhhhhhhhhh
and this time, it was sorta different, 'cause I felt personally responsible,
I felt like, you know, this is my fault
I shouldn't even, I shouldn't even defend this
and uh, that's what I did, I'm
ehh, really glad for all the support I still got
even though I clearly fucked up, but I'm glad people accepted my apology
uhh, and I was able to move past it
I really started making videos just that just
about stuff that fascinated me
like chris chann
uh, or just talking about memes or
IT'S NOT ORIGINAL CONTENT
yes, I know, but I LOVE talking about these things
I LOVE sharing these things
and I think it's so much more interesting to hear someone talk about something they're interested in
and, uh, that's just been my approach
would I ever make a fucking Star Wars review in 2016? hell no
but did I really have a lot of thoughts about the movie that I wanted to share?
yes, and that's why I did it
and I think it's such a better approach
and I'm so happy I stuck with it
so much has changed this year
but at the end of the year, I am so much happier
I'm so glad I'm here, FINALLY internet is gonna be installed on the 22nd
maybe that has happened already,
even me just keeping my fcking beard,
'cause it's the kinda thing where everyone in the comments will tell you "just shave, just shave"
and I'm like "I like the beard, I'm gonna keep it"
it's really- I know it sounds stupid but I
I really think I- I'm really
proud of myself for gaining a lot more confidence in myself
uh, to resist what other people say
I should do, or how other people tell me how to- how to do things
it's so easy to listen to comments, I really think everyone does
uhhhhhhhhhhhm
but ehhh
I think, at the end of the day, people appreciate that you are you, and not just a product of what other people want you to be
uh, that sounded a lot deeper than I meant it to be
I'm also just really grateful, that I can keep making videos, at this point you look at anyone else that's been number 1 on youtube,
and it's practically a dead channel, and they didn't last very long
so, for me, at this point, to still be relevant enough
that people care what I say and what I do and-
and click on my videos, that really means the world to me
because I still very much enjoy videos,
I get so many 'haters'
saying like: oh, if I was PewDiePie,
I would just quit making videos, he
already made millions
what an idiot, MAYBE
I'm passionate about it, maybe I still enjoy it
it's like.. I really think 2017 is the year where I've lost, uhhh
a lot of support from youtube, but it's the year where I've regained the support from my fans (aww)
and that, I will never forget! 'Cause I went through so many changes
so, it felt like, uhh
so many of my fans hated me, or whatever
I'm just so glad that, finally, we have a community
and finally- AGAIN, and finally we have, uh, I have people that I really feel like there's people that support me
I really do, uh feel like that finally and that, that really means a lot
so thank you! it's been- despite all the downsides,
it's been an amazing year
and I'm really proud and happy looking back, believe it or not
uhhh, you learn from your mistakes,
and, uh,
that's just life!
THAT'S LIFE! it's a Room reference everybody
thank you to everyone for ehh
hanging out with me this year
can't wait for next one
and as always, squad fam- should we do- should we do a brofist?
I'll let it slide this time :)
brofist <3