WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en-GB

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*intense growl*

00:00:04.040 --> 00:00:05.180
Hey, Youtube. *puts on shades*

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*battle music starts*

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Tick, tock.

00:00:10.380 --> 00:00:11.440
TICK, tock.

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Where the fuck

00:00:12.780 --> 00:00:14.200
is my diamond play button?

00:00:14.800 --> 00:00:17.260
It's been 84 YEARS!

00:00:20.040 --> 00:00:21.020
Yeah, that's right youtube,

00:00:21.020 --> 00:00:21.580
I said it.

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You think i'm scared?

00:00:23.840 --> 00:00:25.620
Like all these other pussy-ass youtubers?

00:00:26.140 --> 00:00:26.640
Like:

00:00:26.640 --> 00:00:27.440
MARKIPLIER,

00:00:27.960 --> 00:00:29.000
JACKSEPTICEYE,

00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.040
or CinnamonToastKen-

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Ken: Oh shit!
Pewds: I'll tell-

00:00:32.380 --> 00:00:32.880
Ken: WADDUP?

00:00:33.460 --> 00:00:34.940
Pewds: OH SHIT IT'S YOUR BOI
*constant screams of YEAH*

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YOUR BOY, IT'S YA BOI
*more YEAH's*

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WELCOME TO THE ROAST!

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WOAH!

00:00:39.480 --> 00:00:40.840
BITCH (x2)

00:00:41.040 --> 00:00:43.040
PREPARE TO GET INFILT- ff

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What's the word? *ken's too busy picking up rubber duck*

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INFILTRATE-

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PREPARE TO GET-

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*thinks of the word*

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ANNIHILATED!

00:00:50.400 --> 00:00:51.180
*they both scream*

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Hey youtube,

00:00:59.720 --> 00:01:01.740
what a great streaming service you got there,

00:01:01.740 --> 00:01:02.820
with youtube red, *prepare for roast*

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too bad netflix has already been a thing.

00:01:05.020 --> 00:01:05.740
*OH (some random words)*

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*OHHHHH*

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please still- fun youtube

00:01:09.820 --> 00:01:10.620
scare pewdiepie *shameless advertisement*

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youtube red.

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but you ain't shit

00:01:12.360 --> 00:01:13.660
*snicker* BITCH!

00:01:13.660 --> 00:01:15.660
THAT'S RIGHT YOU AIN'T SHIT THO,

00:01:15.820 --> 00:01:16.320
BITCH!

00:01:16.560 --> 00:01:19.360
and how about that youtube streaming service?

00:01:19.880 --> 00:01:22.200
good thing twitch isn't already a thing!

00:01:22.880 --> 00:01:24.420
o-oH GOD THE TRUTH, *is ken having a heart attack?*

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HE SPEAKS THE TRUTH!

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pewds: i speak the truth. 
ken: JESUS, OH JESUS!

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AH!

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ken: tell 'em what's up, tell 'em what's up

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HEY YOUTUBE,

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THAT COMMENT SYSTEM IS FUCKING AWESOME.

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just kidding, IT SUCKS!

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OH THE POWER OF PEWDS COMPELS YOU!

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pewds: it- / THE POWER OF PEWDS COMPELS YOU!

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IT COMPELS YOU!

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KEN: WOO, WOO
PEWDS: ARE YOU COMPELED?! (x2)

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KEN: I FEEL THE HOLY SPIRIT OF PEWDIEPIE

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PEWDS: OH YEAH

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WOOO!

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*weird exhaling which sounds like coughing out a phlegm*

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is it hot in here or is-

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YOUR ASS JUST GETTING R.O.A.S.T.E.D?!

00:01:51.580 --> 00:01:52.800
2 RUBBER DUCKS BITCH

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ROBBER DUCK-

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wait

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what the fuck?

00:01:55.720 --> 00:01:56.520
HEY YOUTUBE,

00:01:56.600 --> 00:01:58.480
GOOGLE PLUS WAS A GREAT IDEA

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TOO BAD FACEBOOK ISN'T ALREADY A THING

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OH CLOWN ART!

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*more screaming*

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LEAVE A LIKE!

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hey youtube,

00:02:07.900 --> 00:02:08.600
i'm proud of you.

00:02:08.600 --> 00:02:10.600
you made so much money
through out the years-

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OH WAIT, YOU DIDN'T MAKE SHIT!

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OH!

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*ken faints*

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HOW 'BOUT YOU TAKE MORE THAN FORTY FIVE PERCENT OF OUR INCOME?!

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wait

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what? *takes off shades*

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y-yeah they take 45%

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45 percent?

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45 percent.

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*ken has another heart attack*

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YOUTUBE GAMING? MORE LIKE,

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YOUTUBE LAME-ING *dat creativity*

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up-top! (nice fail there, guys)

00:02:40.180 --> 00:02:41.220
you missed on purpose, right?

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*manly giggling*

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YOUTUBE RED,

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MORE LIKE-

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YOU-Y

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YO-YOUPORN

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REDTUBE

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HEY YOUTUBE, *drink everytime pewds says this*

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your search algorithm is so corrupt,

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IT MAKES VLADIMIR PUTIN

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LOOK LIKE JESUS!

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OH JESUS-

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DO WE NEED ANOTHER LEAFY?!

00:03:08.500 --> 00:03:10.500
DO WE NEED ANOTHER CLICKBAIT PIECE-OF-SHIT?

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AMEN

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*doorbell rings*

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who the fuck is that?

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i think it's me (what?)

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let's check it out.

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*intense overly used trailer movie music* 
(to be continued)

