waaaaaalllmaaarttt (echos)
*smiles*
Youtube has become a reality TV show, everybody,
from Tanacon, to Fouseytube
toooooooooooooooo (drumroll please)
the fight between KSI and Logan Paul and Jake Paul and Deji
i wasn't even gonna watch it...
i didnt even care when i heard about it
but then the memes *ding *
the beautiful- the beautiful memes.
wherever there is memes
i will be there (to kill them)
and the last press conference was a beautiful thing
Jake/Logan: (chants a curse upon KSI and Deji)
waaallmaaart
last conference was in LA,
this one took place in UK, if you ask me
the Paul brothers won the first press conference
they just went full meme
KSI and the Deji? they just weren't ready for it
*chuckles*
you can tell
(logan paul impostor stares into your soul)
so now this one takes place in UK
and no one like the Pauls in UK
Jake Paul : Aye! Y'all dumbasses say anything ELSE?!
Deji: BOOORING! (Deji chants his curse upon jake)
Crowd: BOORING! (crowd makes curse stronger)
Jake: Y'all say anything else?
P: like, Walmart
*giggles*
you guys keep saying the same thing, WALMAAAAAAAAART
*laughs*
their press conference started off, half of it is completely normal,
because - because it's not youtubers involved,
it's actual boxers.
True Geordie (ref): "You used to be a boxer?"
Undercard guy 1:"YEAH"
person: we owned this charity called rethink.or-
pewds: no one cares
blah blah blah charity this charity that c'mon
Jake: yeah.
pewds: then the youtuber comes out
Jake: Boo if Deji's a bitch! *Crowd Boos* (x2)
pewds: they fell - i can't, i mean the audience must feel de-destroyed right now
i cant believe they fell for that
oldest trick in the book. well played Jake.
Jake (Dumbass): Thought you guys were on Deji's team?
YEEEEAAH (mating call)
DID SOMEONE THRoW AN AIRPLANE???
(repeats mating call)
basically, people kept throwing things on stage and the ref got so done.
Jake: Respect. (all about it in japan according to logan)
Geordie: "Don't be throwing anything"
Jake: "Yeah"
Geordie: Don't be throwing nothing, alright?
Spoilers, people gonna keep throwing stuff (how could you)
even outside there was a riot and people throw,
G Fuel (dramatic sound effect)
can you believe this?!?!?! (no)
Who just throws G Fuel (beings of pure evil)
Geordie: Alright,
And his opponent...
It's Deji. *crowd cheers*
pewds: and then out comes Deji and he finally has,
a crowd that cheers for him (for the first time)
(Havana by Camila Cabello plays ?????? I don't really know tbh)
(Jakes bodyguard becomes an overprotective mother)
AH, AH
LOOK AT THE PIT STAINS
HE'S SWEATING!!!!!
Jake: Look at his pit stains!
Jake: HE'S SWEATING! (which is heresy)
Jake: LOOK AT THE PIT STAINS!
Jake: HE'S SWEATING! (watch for spanish inquisition)
Geordie: Don't be throwing anything.
Jake: (mating call)
Geordie: (essentially repeats)
(mating bird gets attacked by hawk)
(not captioning this, Jake Paul is retarded)
Geordie: -cause it's an easier fight. Is that true?
(another hawk)
Can we stop throwing (BRRR) because everyone's gonna go home.
Jake: Next boxing gym: home of 0 world champions.
Deji: 0 world champions?!
(Geordie tries to talk to Jake but Jake's too focused on why his mating calls have no effect)
*patting the mic*
YOUR GYM IS BAD
*continues patting the mic*
YOUR GYM IS TRASHED
Jake: (repeats)
*jake pats the mic*
Jake: C'mon in today to Vic's boxing gym! We train Deji and that's it.
Deji: DAMN STRAIGHT! DAMN STRAIGHT!
Deji: THAT'S HOW IT IS!
pewds: (feels the cringe) oh my god, the comebacks are so dumb, and so bad.
here's what he's saying
you don't say, "Yeah, that's it!" you say, "Yeah, they only need to train the Number 1!"
or
"Yeah, I don't even need training to break your spleen right now."
but then they get into the real stuff, the really important
the-the comical observations
like, "What are you wearing?"
Jake : He's still dressed like BRRR
TrueGeordie : Do you think he's deliberately uploading like these lots of (...) for this fight?
TrueGeordie : Do you think Jake Paul is putting minimum training footage.
Jake : At least try on the second-
TrueGeordie : JAKE! JAKE, CALM DOWN, CALM DOWN ALRIGHT? (geordie puts jakey to nappy)
TrueGeordie : Do you think that Jake is deliberately putting bare minimum videos up to make it look like he's not training
so he's got excuses or d'you just think he's trying to hide it from you?
here's the question.
Do you think Jake is putting up bare minimum videos to sh- hide that he's actually training?
What is the answer to the question?
Deji: I just hope he can fight better than he can dress.
cuz Jake dress like BRRR.
You are actual BRRR.
u dwess bad. no U dwess bad. Uh-huh. no U dwess bad *laughs*
Jake: Let it out. Let it out. ----- Deji: Yeah, whose period blood is that.
Whose period b- YOU'RE WEARING RED TOO!
god dammit
TrueGeordie: Deji is clearly smaller than you.
Deji: My man, you're still wearing heels.
Jake : There's zero percent chance that Deji wins this fight. Deji: Why are you wearing high heels?
(Jake repeats while Geordie peeks)
*chuckles* the ref checks if he's actually wearing high heels *laughs*
he's like... "Those are high heels actually"
*ukulele note plays as a crow flies*
TrueGeordie: No touching.
TrueGeordie : Don't throw anything. C'mon.
Deji: (chanting) Leave the stage! Leave the stage!
Deji: Yeah YEAH
*earrape*
honestly I think Jake Paul won that one because he actually delivered insults and despite being,
fish out of water. it's all Deji fans here. It's all KSI's fans
he handled himself well i thought.
Deji didn't really say any thing.
B U T T H E N
when it looked like it was all over
Deji delivers the fattest line, the most devastated line i-of the century
*epic music* i have never heard an insult so efficient that it completely switched the whole thing around
and Deji won it.
Deji: (chanting) Suck your mum, suck your mum
(repeats) (chant is bass boosted as Deji insults Jake)
*crowd joins*
*a battle army joins*
suck your dad. suck your-
WHAT IS THIS *laughs* SO DUMB
TrueGeordie: What they installed, no more throwing BRRR seriously because the whole thing will stop straight away.
(hawk rebels)
Just do us all a favour.
next up Logan comes out and he looks like he had the worst s*** of his life i honestly
eh, i am a bit concerned about him
*fart sound*
*one more*
Pew : what is up with him? look at him
*tragic low-key music plays as logan gets a Vietnam War flashback*
*earrape*
And then, out comes KSI
*crowd cheers as KSI with Logan Paul wig comes out*
Oh. snap.
he did not.
he wore the wig.
omg
*crowd cheering continues*
KSI: that walmart BRRR won't work here boi
*crowd cheers*
Pewds : what is he doing? he's just-
*pewds laughing*
*more laughter from pewds*
Pewds : Oh Logan!
...he looks like he's about to cry
KSI: Hasn't England already suffered enough?
We lost to Croatia in the semi-finals...
We had Trump come over last week...
NOW WE GOT *YOU* THIS WEEK!
*applause from the crowd*
KSI: How you feelin' bro?
he doesn't look like he's feeling well
you're literally in a room with a thousand people that just despise you
Jesus!
KSI: How are you, gonna try and audition for Baywatch...
get the part...
and still not end up in the final movie?
*loud applause from the crowd*
My song ended up in the final movie!
Wher- Where were you?
Oh yeah...
DELETED SCENES. (ouch)
pewds: OHHHHHHHHHH *warped laugh*
👏 👏
OHH OHH OHH
aww that's gotta hurt
the end of this is beautiful cuz he- he just stops going after Paul, Logan.
and he goes after her(!)- his parents instead (bad speak)
KSI: -lusional dad
*crowd*
You're disgusting, mate.
You said you'd beat me in the fight...
(repeats)
....with one hand right?
You wouldn't do BRRR!
You're an old man!
But I'm sure, I'm sure, you wouldn't mind lasting one round of all the little girls you like kissing.
Pewds: OHHH
*crowd cheers*
AHHA HOH
ugh
OHH OW DAMN OHH
oh my god, he looks like he's trying to be twenty.
KSI: YOU SICK, DEAD BEAT, BALD-HEADED PBRRK
Pewds : omg
KSI: How you gonna make not one but two dumbass children? (he has a point)
*crowd cheers rise*
The f- is wrong with your sperm?!
*pewds loses it*
Logan Paul's father : If you wanna ask about the...
*KSI mocks*
...ASK YOUR MOM! (terrible your mom insult)
Pewds : oh wow Logan Paul's father : ASK YOUR MOM
AHHH YOUR MOM
Jesus Christ
this thing is so DUMB i can't believe it *chuckles*
KSI: Is that lip quivering? Logan : Yo! Hey!
KSI: Is that li- How's that lip? Logan : Hey, I would
Logan : ...love to sit here...
and answer your questions...
I feel like KSI addressed everything.
London, I'm out!
I'll see you in August 25th. (leaves like a girl)
Pewds : DAMN I CAN'T BELIEVE HE BAILED
(hero saves mic)
KSI: Oh where you going bro?
*trademark maniacal laughter*
*epic battle opening music*
Youtube is a strange place right now,
but it's entertaining at the very least
at least we have that,
at least it's not boring,
(reads) Logan Paul has disconnected from The Lobby
*chuckles*
man, he didn't even try, did he? Jesus Christ.
next up is the fight. i don't know why i am so invested at this point (me with ur captions)
this is so dumb,
i hate how i'm invested. it's like when you watch trash TV (love island)
and you're like, "Why am I watching this?!"
no. i don't want - just go away
Deji, uhh, seemed like no one was rooting for him, like
all his friends, Keemstar, they're all like, "Ah...
...I don't think he can beat Jake.
Jake is a lot bigger."
but i felt bad for Deji. i was like, "Damn!"
especially after the LA conference, i'm like 'wow, no-one's rooting for him, he changed trainer--
but he's also such an idiot, he's also so dumb.
like, it's very conflicting emotions here.
i want to root for Deji, but he's just too much of a moron
but then again you have Jake, who's a double moron
i think the reason why this match is so interesting is because i don't care who wins.
it's the same thing, but what i hope happens is that Jake wins, over Deji,
because to be honest, i don't care who Deji fights next, right?
i would rather see Jake challenge someone else next-- that would actually be interesting
i think KSI's gonna beat Logan Paul, and i also hope that's gonna happen, not necessarily because i hope KSI's gonna win--
but-- Logan Paul, he probably had the worst year of his life, i do feel a little bad for him
he never really recovered after the whole Japanese incident
and yes, he's a moron, yes everyone knows now he's a moron, but-- i feel like---
there are definitely worse people on youtube
and then KSI can go on and challenge more people as well, so you have one winner from each team.
that's what I hope, at least, i don't know why i care,
i don't care, by the way, trust me, i don't care, like *laughs* could go either way-- I DON'T CARE, alright?
Why am i promoting this for free they're just going to claim the video like last one.
*sweet Tetris guitar cover music*