*Pewds Intro* (RIP Headphone Users)
Why... is PewdiePie... the DUMBEST YouTuber...
Why? is PewdiePie the DUMBEST YOUTUBER? X2
WHY is Pewdiepie(triggered)
the DUMBEST YouTuber?!
WHY is he the dumbest YouTuber??? WHY??
I demand an answer. Oh wait! There's a video.
There, it's right there. Speaking the truth, one video at a time.
Hey how's it going bros, my name is [vomit sound]
Wait, you just can't sample one of my videos as your fuckin' intro.
Thank you very much.
What if I did that to one of your other videos.
[Poods]: Oh Jesus Christ... [Sorscha]: But seriously guys, don't wear yoga pants unless you--
Someone is trying hard f-fucking hell..
[Sorscha]: ...wanna be slut. Like, yoga pants are so slutty.
It's so slutty
[Repeats] So slutty
...
[Louder] So slutty.
SO SLUTTY.
[Filtered voice] ...to wear pants that ACTUALLY fit.
So HEDAAAN
Okay, this person is insane, let's see what she has to say.
[Sped up intro music]
[Sorsha]: Pewdiepie is the most subscribed to YouTube channel with 37 million subscriber--
[Sigh] Forty-- Forty six. But this was made in 2015-- I'll give you a pass.
[Sorsha]: What is he doing with those 37 million subscribers?
[Sorsha, disgusted]: What is he DOING with those [slowed down] 37 million subscribers...
What is she looking at when she says that?(umm booties?)
[Sorsha the female onsion] What is he doing with those-- [ ! ],[Gunshots] [Metal Gear Solid Alert Theme]
Camera's right here! You gotta-- What are you looking? Don't-
[Sorsha]: So slutty. [ ! ] [Metal Gear Solid Alert Theme]
Is this a video? This is a video! What the fuck?!
Is this a video? This is a video! The fuck? (How to make money on youtube)
What the fuck?
She-- Oh my god.
[Laughing] Oooh my God! This was done recently! Someone discovered the watch time thing.
[Laughing] Oh my God!
[Inhales] Ohh this makes everything so much better; I should've done more research.
The video ends.. at 7:41, but she wanted to get it more than 10 minutes
so she could have an extra ad in there... So she just added the thumbnail.
Brilliant! I'm not even talking about the vide-- I need to watch the video, I'm sorry.
[Sorsha the vegan almighty lord] What in the fuck is he doing?
[Pewds] What am I doing?
[Sorsha] Don't get me wrong, I love the fact that PewDiePie can make a living off off playing videogames.
You just answered your own question. Ya dumb bit--
[ ! ] [Metal Gear Solid Alert Theme]
[Sorsha] As great as it is to have an income from playing videogames,
[Sorsha, who really should shut up at this point] And to have the most subscribed YouTube channel on YouTube,
[Sorsha] What good is it for?
[Sorsha, echoing] What good is it for?
What?
[Sorsha] Why not influence people to stop exploiting, torturing, raping and slaughtering innocent beings for food!?
Wait, raping?
[Sorsha] Raping
Wait, wait, rapin--?
[Sorsha] Raping
Did she say raping?
[Sorsha] Raping
For food?
[Sorsha] Raping
Raping animals for food?
[Sorsha] Raping and slaughtering innocent beings [Loud noise]
What the f-- [scrambling for words]
[Sorsha]: If PewDiePie were to go vegan, he'd have a meaningful message.
If I went vegan, I would have a meaningful message.
Are all vegans part of some cult or something? Like what's happening? What about all the charity that I do?
We raised over a million dollars towards many different charities, is that not a meaningful message enough?
Or does animals only matter? I'm just confused.
[Sorsha] An additional few million subscribers? Doesn't mean shit.
If you're not a vegan, whatever the fuck you've accomplished, it don't matter for shit!
This is, like, why no one will take vegans seriously; 'cause one bat shit crazy person comes out and says stuff like this
And everyone else just gets discredited.
[Sorsha]: If you don't have a core message that's making a positive impact on the planet,
[Sorsha]: What the fuck are you doing?
Yeah what the fuck am I doing?
[Sorsha]: What the fuck are you doing?
God dammit, what the fuck am I doing, raising money, millions of dollars for charity! What the fuck am I DOING?!
[Sorsha]: What the fuck are you doing?
I'm not a vegan! [Thuds]
God damnit! I'm not a vegan!
[Sorsha]: If you don't have a core message that's making a positive impact on the planet,
[Sorsha, repeatedly and loudly] What the fuck are you doing?
[Sigh] Entertaining millions of people... for years?
[Sorsha, laughing]: Seriously, what the fuck are you doing?
[Imitating] Seriously, what the fuck are you doing?
[Sorsha] Seriously--
[Stuttering] S-Seriously..
[Sorsha] Seriously--
[Exaggeratedly] What the fuck are you doing?
[Sorsha] What the fuck are you doing?
[Mocking] Why aren't you vegan like me, man?
[Sorsha] Seriously, what the fuck are you doing?
[Mocking] Why aren't you vegan, like I am?
[Sorsha] Seriously
[Mocking] I'm a vegan!
[Sorsha] Seriously (zoom at the boobies)
[Mocking] Alright? I am, at LEAST, twenty percent better than you fuckin' piece of shi--
How can you eat meat, you fucking dirty--
[Sorsha, overlapping] "So slutty" "Seriously"
Even cows' milk-- I fucking spit that shit in your fuck--
[Mocking] How can you NOT be a vegan, man?
[Sorsha] What the f*ck are you doing?
[Mocking] How can you not see how blind you are?
[Growing more upset] How can you not fucking understand what a piece of fucking lowlife piece of shit you are?
[Sorsha] Seriously, what the fuck are you doing?
[Angsty piano] I don't have a core message.. [Sorsha speaking in the background]
I don't know my core message, but I'm pretty sure what hers is
Being a cu-- [Random Metal Gear Solid music again]
For my core message, I need to show as much of my skin as possible.
And wear yoga pants.
[Sorsha] "So slutty" "Seriously what the fuck are you doing, go get a core message and make a positive impact on the planet
She's insane! She's insane. I'm scared! She will murder me.
[Sorsha] Go do it; carb the fuck up, harden the fuck up, and go get a core message--
What!?
[Sorsha] That's making positive impact on the planet, go do it right NOW. (Like you deleting your channel?)
[Muffled laughter]
[Sorsha] Go, go! Stop watching this video, and go do it. Go do it! Go find a core message (Says the smart-ass, *Ba Dum Tss!, get it?, k, i gonna jump from the window now)
That's making a positive impact on the planet. Go do it, noowww. (K, but give me your number first)
Go now, you should be gone, why aren't you gone right now?
Go do something positive to the planet, like, go vegan maybe? I don't know. (Because you know the secrets of the entire world and universe?)
[Progressively less intelligible] It's not like going vegan isn't positive or anything like that, watch--
No. Go vegan and save the planet. [Claps] Go vegan. [Claps]
Be nice to animals. [Claps]
Treat people like shit. [Claps]
I'm tw-- I'm twen--- I'm twenty percent better than you. [Claps]
[Intense music] My name is Sorsha and I have.. nothing to define me as a human being.
I have no actual personality... [chuckles]
Or... anything that makes me stands out from the crowd, and [chuckles]
I can't stand that fact about myself,
so I've decided to... label myself as something
[choking up] in an attempt to make me feel more valued.
And, to make me feel superior over other people,
I am telling them what a piece of fucking shit they are
for not being up here with me, the superior being who has [laughs]
levitated towards a higher being, and I...
FUCKING HATE THE WORLD. [snorts]
[Sorsha]: Carp the FUCK up!
Oh my god-
[Sorsha] Do it now.
[Outro music]
I love how she discovered that 10-minute mark thing. This is--this is making me so happy.
This is what you did, YouTube. [laughs]
This is the kinda shit that happens when people understand how the algorithm work.
I like how she tells me to find my own core message, but really she's just telling me that I'm not a vegan and that I'm a piece of shit. [Laughs]
Thank you very much for helping me find my core message.
I will now go on and tell Michael, who's in the other room, what a piece of shit HE is, for not finding HIS core message.
Now I would really appreciate that my 47 million subscribers-- first, you turn vegan,
and then you find the person next to you , and you tell them that "you're a piece of shit who hasn't found their core message"
Despite any kind of accomplishment or abilities that they may have,
if they haven't found their core message, tell them that they need to fuckin' die. [Laughs]
Tell them they need to find it
or otherwise they're a piece of fucking shit
and you are ten times better than them
And also let's sample
her yoga pants one more time
Because she did that to me (so slutty)
Thank you very much this has been a pleasure.
Leave a like if you enjoyed.
Ah, I'll do the brofist. I'll go out
We'll add the thumbnail, that's how we do this
*kiss hand* Thank you bros for watching. And as always,
Stay awesome bros.
Wow, great. I knew he'd do this (Don't complain. This gives us time to write subtitles that should be marked as spam but aren't)
So yeah, ***** here, (censoring username because shame on your self promotion)
This Thumbnail is really exciting
I mean, lets inspect this Thumbnail
Lets begin!
On the left side we see a feggit
And on the other side (Hello it me) we see a Unknown Creature named "my mother"
kewrjfaklsejhflksjdflkjfl
Tiddy >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
( . Y . )
Oh hey free subtitle open. HI MOM HI DAD HI FRIEND
get memed
Wher is ur cor messig Wat's a voice messegeeee
In all my years i've never seen such a lack of core message
Why are still watching? Go.
GO NOW! FIND YOU CORE MESSAGE!
( . Y . )
That counts for something
Ugh I think I ate a bad omelette
My core message is coming out
*
Are we gonna
disregard the fact that
SHE IS SHOWING HER SHOULDERS (OH NO ANYTHING BUT THE SHOULDERS)
We ARE GONNa have th ERECTIONS
Shrek meme 420