OOH I KN--I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!
AND SHUSH SHUSH SHUSH, JUST SHUSHUSH
This is exactly what I wanna do with my life, okay.
This is exactly what I wanna do.
NO, NO, NO, NO...
I haven't run out of ideas.
I got PLENTY o' ideas, in the backlog of videos to make, okay?
It's a long, compiled list, of ideas.
And I'm saving them...
So today...
We are.. we're gonna play: Dating Games!
DATING GAMES!
I know how much you love them.
So much
How much?
How mu
How much?
Oh..
Oh
Well aren't you in luck...
'Cause the first one...
Is really good.
Okay, so many of you guys, have suggested this... this game.
It's called...
see if I can record my screen.
How do I...?
How do I record my screen on the phone
Okay, Google. How do I record my scr-
MY HORSE PRINCE
Is the horse calling me?
*ring* *ring*
Hello?
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH
So in this game, oh my god. sub op SepLopesCardozo
He's just doing it..
You click, and he gets..
"I kind of want some now"
And she's not talking about the carrots
AMIRITE
(smoooooooth music plays)
Okay we're out of energy now.
Did he just poop one out?
Okay, so let's talk to him.
"Do you like ranches?"
"I do!"
*wheeze*
Excellent!
YESSSSS!
Oh, what a relief!
that we both like ranches.
We're like a perfect match!
Hey, let's talk to him again.
"What do you think of carrots?"
Y'know.. That...self-realisation of what the fuck you're doing in your life..
It hits you harder than anything, when you see yourself in the black, the black mirror...
While playing a game and it loads.
I WANNA DIE
OH HE LEVELED UP!!!
My god.
"Your bond has grown stronger."
"He sure did eat a whole lot today"
"He eats like a horse.."
OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD.
WHAAAAAAAT IS THAT?
He's just keep going, huh? PSSSHHH. [sic]
MMMMMMMM
THUD THUD THUD THUD THUD THUD THUD
"Hey, slow down there, buddy!"
"EEEK!"
"THUD"
Ooooh
That's a good move; I'll remember that one for Marzia.
HEY, HEY MARZIA
(Pewds Imitating Marzia) "What is it Pudipiiii?"
THUD THUD THUD THUD THUD THUD
(Pewds Imitating Marzia) Eeeeh!
I'm sorry, Marzia...
OH MY FUCKING GOOODDDD!
Mah pants are wet now, great, thank you.
"Hey"
"EEE (HUH)"
"Whats happening?!"
"Is this the thing you see in the movies?!"
"SO"
(PEWDS GULPING)
Heh, Ahahahaha!
"Will you be my owner?"
"EEE, OKI"
*WHEEZE*
"What?? I didn´t even hesitate"
Great!
GREAT
"Looking forward working with you owner" [sic]
oh my god...
What?!
why??
why...
I don't understand...
*throws phone* I'll never play that game again.
Stupid game
Okay, moving on, to the next dating game.
I know what you're thinking.
"OH THAT WAS A GOOD VIDEO PEWDS"
OH, IT AIN'T OVER YET, BABY
We got more, we got-- I got dating games, FOR DAYS!
Now this is one, that I've been playing for a very long time.
I've sunken about 500 hours into this game...
It's called "You've been caught!"
That's a lie, it's called (laugh), it's called "Emma cheating Liam"
So Emma loves Liam, but she's dating this other guy.
Okay, so we gotta love him, like this.
Love 'im real FUCKIN' hard
Oh he's lookin'
Next one... OH MY GOD, that is not very subtle, is it?
(laugh) Oh, he's super pissed.
Why is she crying, bitch?
Sorry
What is this game teaching kids?
(Pewds imitating other guy) "Ayy, what are you guys makin' up-- or makin' out or some shit?
(Pewds imitating Emma) "No, I'm just playing makeup"
AAAABLBLLBLBLBLBLBLLBBLL
*Pewds slurping very moistly and gagging*
Poor guy... Poor guy
Love is in the air, everyone! Love is in the air!
I am lov-- OH MY GOD
What, that was it...?
Th-- Okay, that was it.
And he's crying in the back...
Listen, I know you're lonely, I know you don't have a... friend.
I'll-- I'll help you, just follow these games!
Ohhhh, this one has a funky tune, I li-- I like this one a lot
"Catch your chance!"
Ok, well, how about we start with the first date!
"First date", excellent, "3, 2, 1. Catch your chance."
What is happening? Am I controlling this?
Oh, I am! Okay, how?
Okay I--
I, (laughs), Smooth mov--! (laughs)
(laughing) Okay, I'm controlling this
Oh, look at this guy, Mr. Cool, Mr. Smooth over here!
Tryna get around this lady, in the cinema!
Alright, we got the stars, now let's move in for the shoulder touch.
Oh my god! Fuck yeah, (wheeze laugh) Hell yeah!
Now, if I was only as smooth as Mr. Slippy over here.
Alright, "Scratch that itch" is the next one.
Okay, alright, this might be difficult, but I'll do my best!
Alright, I wish his-- I'm curious if his other parts are the same like this. [sic]
I can only... imagine
(swooping sounds)
Oh!
Am I actually supposed to-- Oh my god.
"You lose"?
Well, that's in the e-- the eye of the owner [sic, beholder], you know what I mean?
I am 27 years old... (laugh)
You know, she's pretty hot for Slippy, so we gotta ma-- we gotta make sure we do this right.
There we go, thanks for moving your feet, honey.
Oh, probably under my feet as well, okay got it.
Then what? What the-- How long is my arm? (laughing) I'm gonna itch myself. Oh that's brilliant!
This is how I do it, too. It's-- it's a normal, standard procedure.
Here we go, don't fuck this up.
Ohh, that (laughs). She's like "What the fuck is wrong wi--?" (trails off)
I-- I actually unironically itched myself. J-Jesus Christ.
Okay, we have two more levels, we gotta "impress mom", that's fine. "Impress HER mom".
Well, this should be easy.
The music really helps with-- Oh god, she's not impressed, is she? What is she, Marge Simpson?
Oh that's a... bird.
Now let's swooze in, baby! How you doin', girl?
That's real smooth, that's real fuckin' smooth! If I only played this game when I was a kid. [sic]
Oh, lemme tell ya, things would be different!
"Tongue tied", what the fuck is that?
Tongue tied...
(smooth music)
No...
Oh. My. God. Oh, her vagina better b-- oh my god, oh my god!
I-- No-- I don't know about this. Ahh, this is some weird hentai shit, man. (laughs)
Oh, what a beautiful ending! (laughs) I know what you're thinking, and I'm thinkin' the same thing.
On 3... BEST FUCKING G--
SH- SHUT UP
(trumpet tune)
(laughing) Naruto dating sim
(sings in Japanese, along to the song)
LALALALALALA
(screaming)
Ohhhh m--,
(sexy voice) "What do you think of Naruto?"
"I prefer not to think of Naruto." Okay.
'S that Cry? I swear that's fuckin' Cry!
(in-game, woman) Let's go talk somewhere more... private
(in-game, man) Okay
"Space to get closer"
(creepy music)
oh my god (4x)
(laughs)
She has herpes! "TAP SPACE TO RUN!" (tapping) OHHH AHHH
AHHHH, "RUN WITH THE ARROW KE--" FUCK, shyu-- you have herpes
Shiiit...
"Up to jump."
Why am I playing this?
I don't know how to deal with this.
(mumbling something) Ok-- you're dead. (laughs)
For fuck's sake.
I can't stop playing this fucking game.
Well, I think we learned a lot here today, and the lesson is to--
WATCH ANOTHER VIDEO, of Pewdiepie and leave a like if you enjoyed.
Thank you guys so much for watching, and I'll see you bros
in-- uhh, ho-- good luck with your dating endeavours, and I'll see you, in the next one.
As always: stay awesome, bros
Y'know....
Lemme just take this time to say that I would date you...
...if you weren't so ugl--