WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en-GB

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what the fuck did y-

00:00:02.060 --> 00:00:03.040
 

00:00:03.040 --> 00:00:03.540
*gasps*

00:00:04.620 --> 00:00:06.620
*dramatic music*

00:00:07.240 --> 00:00:08.120
*vomiting noises*

00:00:12.460 --> 00:00:13.340
*more vomiting noises*

00:00:16.480 --> 00:00:17.420
*more vomiting noises by pewds*

00:00:17.420 --> 00:00:17.920
ye

00:00:18.360 --> 00:00:19.200
Tay Sway

00:00:20.520 --> 00:00:21.480
guide me

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on a great

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*Blank Space by Tay Sway plays*

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choo-choo on this

00:00:29.360 --> 00:00:30.620
mother fucker

00:00:31.300 --> 00:00:35.220
*Tay Sway singing*
*explosion sounds*

00:00:35.220 --> 00:00:35.720
ye

00:00:35.720 --> 00:00:37.560
what the fuck are they doing??

00:00:38.820 --> 00:00:39.480
why?

00:00:42.680 --> 00:00:45.100
AAAAYYYYEEE

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ye

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*pewds chewing*

00:00:49.580 --> 00:00:51.040
*chewing is making fart-like noises*

00:00:54.760 --> 00:00:56.320
do you want to see some fireworks, mate?

00:00:57.620 --> 00:00:58.120
alright

00:01:00.860 --> 00:01:01.920
not everyone is ready

00:01:02.420 --> 00:01:04.860
*more weird chewing sounds*

00:01:06.380 --> 00:01:08.140
yeah you better back up a little bit more man

00:01:16.660 --> 00:01:17.340
*burps

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no fear

00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:20.660
that's right!

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Oh!

00:01:25.820 --> 00:01:27.320
yeah, you're good. you're good

00:01:27.660 --> 00:01:28.220
thank you

00:01:31.200 --> 00:01:31.760
thank you

00:01:32.560 --> 00:01:33.060
ye

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*gags*

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that looks good

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*gags again*

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Malcolm: I hate Pewdiepie

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because

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Pewdiepie sucks and-

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he- and... sucks

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fanboys sucks

00:01:49.380 --> 00:01:50.720
Pewdiepie sucks

00:01:50.720 --> 00:01:52.720
I hate fucking Pewdiepie

00:01:52.720 --> 00:01:55.620
Don't call me fat because you fat, too

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BITCH

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ye

00:02:01.700 --> 00:02:02.200
here we go

00:02:03.140 --> 00:02:06.140
OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH

00:02:06.440 --> 00:02:07.560
OHHHHH!!!!!

00:02:07.560 --> 00:02:08.060
bros

00:02:08.060 --> 00:02:09.380
I'll have you know I love you!

00:02:10.740 --> 00:02:11.760
I'll never forget you

00:02:25.820 --> 00:02:26.520
this is it

00:02:26.760 --> 00:02:27.560
*crashes*

00:02:29.320 --> 00:02:30.140
aye I'm actually fine

00:02:32.100 --> 00:02:33.740
I'm going to use one my last nade

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this one's for Timmy!

00:02:37.440 --> 00:02:39.080
*explosion*

00:02:41.360 --> 00:02:42.940
this is it for Private Pewds!

00:02:43.440 --> 00:02:44.920
sorry I don't think I'm going to make it!

00:02:45.740 --> 00:02:46.600
I'm out of amo

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tell my subs

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tell the bros

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did it for the-

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Private Pie. I got good news

00:02:53.380 --> 00:02:53.880
what??

00:02:54.920 --> 00:02:56.600
you've taken out the enemy

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they're all dead

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really?

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oh

00:03:05.900 --> 00:03:07.360
well how th- about that, bitches?

00:03:07.560 --> 00:03:08.060
ye

00:03:08.060 --> 00:03:10.200
I think Pewdiepie probably does prank videos

00:03:10.200 --> 00:03:10.700
like

00:03:10.700 --> 00:03:11.920
with the dick slaps

00:03:11.920 --> 00:03:12.820
I dunno

00:03:18.980 --> 00:03:20.300
surprise motherfucker, sample

00:03:20.460 --> 00:03:21.720
surprise mutherfucker

00:03:22.260 --> 00:03:23.080
SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER

00:03:23.080 --> 00:03:24.040
Pewds: OHH OHHH OH MY GOD

00:03:24.040 --> 00:03:24.540
NO

00:03:24.680 --> 00:03:25.180
NO

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meh

00:03:25.820 --> 00:03:26.680
eh ehhh

00:03:26.680 --> 00:03:27.460
huh HUH

00:03:34.860 --> 00:03:37.140
OH WHAT THE SHIT WAS THAT??

00:03:37.140 --> 00:03:37.680
zero deaths

00:03:38.680 --> 00:03:39.800
pewds never dies

00:03:40.420 --> 00:03:44.380
*japanese music plays

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oh oh Oh OH OH

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OH OH OH OHHH OHHHHH

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WAH!!

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*epic music plays*

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haters doubted that I couldn't do it

00:04:03.540 --> 00:04:04.440
but they were wr-

00:04:04.960 --> 00:04:05.860
this is art

00:04:05.860 --> 00:04:06.780
like this is

00:04:06.780 --> 00:04:07.280
art

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you can't argue with art

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heeeeeyyyyy

00:04:27.560 --> 00:04:30.780
*blasting dank music*

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[Man on speakerphone] hold on

00:04:49.680 --> 00:04:50.980
I will find you

00:04:51.500 --> 00:04:53.060
[Man] ummmm hi

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I will look for you

00:04:59.420 --> 00:05:01.300
and I will f-fist you

00:05:01.680 --> 00:05:02.500
bro fist

00:05:02.980 --> 00:05:03.480
you

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[Man] are you crazy?

00:05:07.320 --> 00:05:07.960
no

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I'm Pewdiepie

00:05:12.480 --> 00:05:13.520
[M] and...

00:05:14.020 --> 00:05:15.660
[M] o~kay..?

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*hangs up*

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oh man

00:05:24.380 --> 00:05:25.860
LilySing-ing this

00:05:27.720 --> 00:05:29.000
I'm in another game

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oh my god

00:05:33.260 --> 00:05:34.820
there's a car level coming up

00:05:37.540 --> 00:05:38.540
how you ladies doing?

00:05:38.540 --> 00:05:39.480
MORE

00:05:39.580 --> 00:05:41.160
MOREEEE!!

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YEAAAHH

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ugh

00:05:44.380 --> 00:05:45.100
tastes

00:05:45.320 --> 00:05:46.800
GOOD

00:05:47.120 --> 00:05:48.120
yeahh

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oh

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more

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more pow-

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I AM NOT OKAY - MCR &lt;3

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*sad piano*

00:06:28.580 --> 00:06:30.020
the fuck was that?

00:06:38.660 --> 00:06:41.000
you think this is some kind of game?

00:06:41.000 --> 00:06:41.880
*snorts*

00:06:51.500 --> 00:06:52.600
ZERO DEATHS

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*bumps into chair*

00:07:03.680 --> 00:07:04.560
's tricky part.

00:07:04.600 --> 00:07:06.560
are you nervous about playing with me...uh?

00:07:07.100 --> 00:07:08.680
I think you should be nervous

00:07:08.680 --> 00:07:09.180
yeah

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I've seen you play, Conat.

00:07:10.240 --> 00:07:11.380
*nervous laugh*

00:07:11.380 --> 00:07:12.280
you're pretty awful

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Pewds: we cant make anymore mistakes

00:07:15.720 --> 00:07:16.940
Cry: cut

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the

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Cry: alright. you said there's a red wire?

00:07:24.480 --> 00:07:25.120
Pewds: no

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*bomb explodes*

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what does it say?

00:07:27.780 --> 00:07:29.360
it's the One Million one!

00:07:29.360 --> 00:07:31.220
and it's fucking broken!

00:07:31.500 --> 00:07:33.940
congrats for surpassing one million

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oh that's cool

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THAT HAPPENED YEARS AGO

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give me 44 of these!

00:07:39.020 --> 00:07:39.720
hey Jack!

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this is what your fans think you look like

00:07:43.360 --> 00:07:45.240
but this is what you really look like

00:07:47.660 --> 00:07:48.920
which is convenient

00:07:48.920 --> 00:07:50.140
because your videos

00:07:50.140 --> 00:07:51.380
are about as cringey

00:07:51.380 --> 00:07:52.780
as a dove commercial

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I CANT FUCKING STAND YOU

00:07:55.420 --> 00:07:57.200
YOU SON OF A BITCH

00:07:57.240 --> 00:07:59.000
I think this guy is actually legit

00:07:59.000 --> 00:08:00.720
YOU'RE FUCKING USELESS

00:08:00.720 --> 00:08:02.220
YOU *some insult*

00:08:02.220 --> 00:08:03.780
oh oh HEY

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NO

00:08:04.700 --> 00:08:07.680
...THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS. MAYBE MILLIONS OF DO-

00:08:08.260 --> 00:08:09.400
thousands of dollars

00:08:10.940 --> 00:08:11.980
that's cute

00:08:11.980 --> 00:08:12.880
*laughs*

00:08:15.800 --> 00:08:17.580
I'm gonna shave

00:08:17.920 --> 00:08:18.760
fine

00:08:19.420 --> 00:08:20.860
if you shave

00:08:21.380 --> 00:08:24.220
I will make it so that Marzia

00:08:24.720 --> 00:08:25.600
wont

00:08:30.400 --> 00:08:33.060
they call me Beast Master 64

00:08:34.380 --> 00:08:36.260
I'm the greatest Pokemon hunter alive

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step by step

00:08:46.780 --> 00:08:47.680
AH

00:08:54.420 --> 00:08:55.640
the fuck was that?

00:08:55.720 --> 00:08:57.720
that's a Pokemon right there!

00:08:58.180 --> 00:08:59.320
that's a Pokemon!

00:09:00.460 --> 00:09:01.580
I'm not fucking-

00:09:02.280 --> 00:09:03.260
oh my god

00:09:06.220 --> 00:09:07.620
that's my Pokemon

00:09:07.620 --> 00:09:08.680
*Romanian gets shot*

00:09:20.900 --> 00:09:25.740
If pokemon aren't real.. then dogs aren't real either

00:09:25.900 --> 00:09:32.700
*crying*

00:09:32.700 --> 00:09:33.700
*gunshot*

00:09:34.500 --> 00:09:37.700
OWWWWW FUUUUUU

00:09:37.700 --> 00:09:39.200
I can't believe this happened

00:09:39.300 --> 00:09:41.400
I can't believe this

00:09:41.400 --> 00:09:42.400
You won't believe this

00:09:42.400 --> 00:09:44.100
She doesn't believe me

00:09:44.100 --> 00:09:46.300
I can't believe.. these kids

00:09:46.300 --> 00:09:48.100
Can you believe this

00:09:48.100 --> 00:09:49.400
I can't believe this

00:09:49.400 --> 00:09:50.600
I can't believe I fell

00:09:50.900 --> 00:09:52.400
I can't believe it

00:09:52.400 --> 00:09:54.900
I can't belIEVE I FOUND THIS

00:09:54.900 --> 00:09:56.600
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT

00:09:56.600 --> 00:09:58.600
CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS?!

00:09:58.600 --> 00:10:00.600
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!!!

00:10:00.900 --> 00:10:03.600
HE CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!

00:10:03.700 --> 00:10:05.600
*Satan* YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS

00:10:08.600 --> 00:10:09.600
Get the boat

00:10:10.800 --> 00:10:13.400
Get the boat, get the pok-a-bitch

00:10:13.400 --> 00:10:15.400
I'm gonna have to send the pok-a-bitch

00:10:15.900 --> 00:10:17.600
Oo come on pok-a-bitch

00:10:17.900 --> 00:10:19.600
GO POK-A-BITCH!

00:10:19.600 --> 00:10:20.620
Ahh!

00:10:20.620 --> 00:10:21.340
C'mon!

00:10:21.820 --> 00:10:22.520
Oh!!

00:10:23.380 --> 00:10:24.120
Get up!

00:10:28.920 --> 00:10:30.080
Don't film this!

00:10:33.560 --> 00:10:35.120
[bitch]: What the fuck are you doing?

00:10:35.120 --> 00:10:36.200
- Yeah, what the fuck am I doing?

00:10:36.200 --> 00:10:37.620
- What the fuck are you doing?

00:10:37.900 --> 00:10:39.620
- Godammit! What the fuck am I doing?

