Let's get into this game. Hey chair, how you doin'?
*silence*
what a great game....
CHAAAAAAAAAAAIR
Alright, so in this game...
TRUMP IS ABOUT TO DIE!
no
Noo no *laughs*
Okay. So in this game, I'm supposed to save Trump's life
Oh; I am ... crawling
I am crawling to save Trumps' life
(wait) Oh I'm back on track.
Here we go
*we don't need another hero starts playing*
'Welp; Trump is dead yey
But his hair ... did not suffer!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *tina turner in the background*
SHIT THAT'S AWKWARD
Let me try that again!
NOOOOOOOOOOOO *tina*
*laughs*
Trump! You may wanna-
you may wanna-
*gunshot*
... saved his life
i'm a true American hero
TRUMP GIVE ME A HUG
MISSION FAILED... WE'LL GET HIM NEXT TIME
HEY TRUMP
you see that.. uh..... laserscope
just move a lil bit to your left
and now we fuck
STUPID CHAIRS
*THROWS DAT ASS IN A CIRCLE*
OHHHHHH
HOOOOOOOOOLY SHIT
THAT WAS FUCKING AWESOME
YEEE OH YEEEEAH
FUCK YEAH I'M THE PRESIDENT NOW
oh boy... oH BOY
*breaks a wall*
*laughs*
OHHH MAN
this is the best game I've played in a very long time; I gotta say
:OHMYGOD I GOT IT WITH MY CROTCH
i saved hi-
*laughs*
oh Jesus Christ
he's fucken terrifying
this is the greatest game i've ever played
and i've played a LOT of games
*starts dancing*
c'mon dance with me Trump
Come on, dance with me Trump!
OHH YEEEE
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS
What the hell is this!
OOOOH OOOH HE'S MOTORBOATING HIM
HE'S MOTORBOATING HIM
DO IT AGAIN
DO IT AGAIN!
C'MON TRUMP GET IT C'MON TRUMP
EAT HIS A$$
O HE'S LIKING IT OOOO
OHH BOI
......
Oh yeah
*laughs*
oh this is what happens when Trump becomes president
aw shit c'mon
i just wanted the money
that's right Trump keep dancing
he's got the moves (like Jagger)
heee's got the moves
uts uts ah
*FLASHDANCE : SHES A MANIAC MANIAC ON THE FLOOOOR*
*funky dance editing*
*throws himself*
aight here we-
AW SHIT I'M UPSTAIRS
FUCK
FUUCK
GET UP
GEEEET UP
*movie scene* get up
*hero music*
tRUMP NOOOOO
what is happening?
OH! AW SHIT THERE'S-
THEY GOT BOMBS
FOR FUCKS SAKE
I'm not paid enough for this
*sad music* no!
Trump...
you gotta live man
..
*intense music*
Oh my god, what is happening?
*music intensifies*
TRUMP LIVES
*music intensifies*
I don't-
well what am-
if Tr-
oh oH-
*MUSIC*
I guess i did it
I guess I did it
Ok great
There's a man who leads a life of danger
To everyone he meets he stays a stranger
With every move he makes
And all the chance he takes
Odds are he won't live to see tomorrow
Secret...
...Agent Man
Secret...
...Agent Man
shooting his dick.. that's just cruel alright
no one deserves that.
...
here we go
...
Aw fuck, wrong button!
SHIT
can we just take a moment to appreciate game developers creating
really good games
we had a rough year with
...
broken promises like No Man's Sky
but..
here's a game that finally lifts up to the hype.. ya know
alright
doin' it for the money
*malcolm1466 voice* ONLY IN IT FOR THE MONEY
OK now this is getting ridiculous
i can't walk on the sand
*pewds is really concentrating*
OHH WOW
OH FUCK RIGHT IN THE SPINE
dude! his hair is fucking nice
how's your hair?
how's your hair Mr. Trump?
Oh boy
it's- it's an honor and a privilege Sir
to be eating your asshole
oh oH not even-
I TRUMP THE TRUMP
now this is quality gameplay
now this is just quality
aaaaaaaand seven
....
oh
was that a giant taco?
how do i protect Trump .. from the Taco?
OH one Taco
c'mon the other Taco
there's another Taco coming
OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH
HELL YEEEEEEEAH
FUCK YEAHH
*throws himself*
STAGE DIVE
oh oH-
front flip
aW SHIT
FRONT FLIP
aw shit
shit
front flip
NAILED IT
FRRRONT FLIP
FRONT FLIP
GOOOOOOO
OHHHHHHH
*some skrillex music starts playing*
YEAH
oh man I'm good at this game
oh shit I got fucking money, I got whiskey
I'm living the liFE
aw shit he's going to China
fuck those Chinese workers man
how am i supposed-
OHHHHHHHHH
KAY
i got it
alright
just ride the pizza
ride the pizza 4 Trump
i don't know what these are but-
but i saved Trump
now what the fuck is this?
where even is he?
what is he- is he killing himself?
he's killing himself
aight, front flip
front-
*laughs*
front flip
FRONT FLIP
THROW YOURSELF
...
*Titanic theme*
Fuck, so close.
*TITANIC*
i don't..really..know what i'm doing at this point
*sin*
*beep*
oh not this fucking shit agai-
what is he doing now
WHAT IS HE EVEN DOING NO- AH
you know sometimes i think he deserves to die
just sometimes
aight here we go
front flip
shit fron-
fuck
he jumps down in a fucking cup of noodles
now this game has gone too far
*laughs* fuckk
god dammit Trump
why am i still even playing this game
at this one point
like
it's a great game but gr- NO
SHIT THAT WAS SO CLOSE
THAT WOULD'VE BEEN SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL
*starts singing* I don't wanna close my Trump
I don't wanna fall asleep
'cause I Trump my babe
and i trump trumpy trumpy trump
*i don't wanna miss a thing starts playing*
AAAAHHHHHHHH
DUDE
THAT WAS SO FUCKING CLOSE MAN
you just have to fucking crawl?!
well watch this then Trump!
FRONT FLIP
SHIT
*Tina Turner - We don't need another hero*
BUM
Ooh, hey
you saw that Trump?
Trump just walks away
nothing happened here... i was not trying to kill myself
where will Trump go?
on his next adventure, no one knows.
will he find a giant pizza to kill himself in next??
WATCH NEXT EPISODE OF TRUMP KILLS HIMSELF!
WATCH NEXT EPISODE OF SUICIDAL TRUMP!
WATCH NEXT EPISODE OF CRIPPLING DEPRESSION: DONALD TRUMP
''You have accepted Rump into your life?''
oh i have
I'm not voting either alright? Calm down.
OH FUCK ME I GOTTA
FRONT FLIP
SHIT
I GOTTA JUMP?!
NO
TRUMP HANG IN THERE BUDDY
PAPA PEWDS IS COMING FOR YA
HAMG IN THERE TRUMP
I GOT YOU BUDDY
I GOT YOU
I JUST GOTTA-
HAAAANG IN THERE BUDDY
NOOOOOOO I MISSED
NOOOOOOOOO
why play the game how it's meant to be?
idk
i don't-
i-
DID IT
*laughs*
NAILED IT
you're fine Mr President
aight now this game has just gotten weird
before it was weird now it's just fucking weird-
CHAIR
FUCK
AY I DID IT
AAAAAAAAND EATING ASS
*secret agent man*
i mean.. i can't interrupt this...
it just looks like they're having a great time
you know what i'll just join the party
*distorted music*
*elevator music*