WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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- Mi-mince-mince-mince-mince-mince

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meat pie.

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(upbeat orchestra music)

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- Mincemeat pies just reminds me

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of like a sad orphan.

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- I haven't decided if
meat should be in pies,

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except chicken pot pie.

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- I know that mince just means like

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finely ground, right?

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- It's like Sweeney Todd, right?

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Except in Sweeney Todd,
he puts humans in there.

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- Dude I haven't seen the movie.

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You just (beep) spoiled it.

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(biting crunch)

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- Oh it's cute!

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- It's like Honey I Shrunk the Kid.

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- This is a mincemeat pie?

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- Is this salt?

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- Is it sugar?

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You've licked it and we're
gonna have to share it.

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(laughing)

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- Sorry.

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- So it is like dessert meat?

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- Where's the meat?

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(laughing)

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- You don't like it?

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- I know it's raisins!

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- Is it raisins?

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It's not even meat?

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- Wait, is there meat in
this with the raisins?

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- Tastes like a pumpkin spice latte.

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- It's better than it smells.

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- This is like a gourmet pop tart.

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- It's like a Fig Newton.

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- So there's no meat in this?

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- I hope there wasn't.

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- Is this just to say that I'm an idiot?

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- Are you trying to kill Santa?

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- He can have it.

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- Should not be called mincemeat.

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Should change to like raisin shortbread.

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- Here, have some ice cream cake,

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and it's actually filled with salmon.

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Like, why did you tell me
it's an ice cream cake?

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- I mean the British have given us

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so many wonderful things like Dr. Who

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but then I question it when I eat this.

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- The mincemeat pies were
surprisingly delicious.

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- Oh my god I sound like
such an idiot right now.

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- I do too.

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- God, I just started dating this guy--

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- And he's gonna know that you don't know

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what a mincemeat pie is.

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- Oh (beep)!

