- My eyelashes look like whiskers.
I would say I'm lookin' like I'm about
to go out for an audition to Cats right now.
(upbeat electronic music)
So we've been dating almost four years
and we also have been living together for two years.
- We've been dating for a year and a half.
We do not live together.
- To me, she seems like the quintessential morning person.
- I hate mornings.
I have like a 6:50 alarm, a 6:55 alarm,
and a 7:02 alarm.
- I go to a boot camp class and then I go back
to the townhouse.
- Uh, okay, but you're forgetting a couple things.
I've caught you several times sitting
in your car eating chips.
I think she does it enough that she should consider
that part of her schedule.
- And then I put a spoonful of coconut oil in my mouth.
- It doesn't do anything!
- No, it does, it's called oil pulling.
It's good for teeth whitening and battling cavities
and general -- - [Man] You have more cavities
than I have, though.
- Well, I just started doing this.
- There you go.
- I like keeping things simple and easy.
- She's like the fast food drive-thru method of makeup.
- Yeah.
- Convenience, consistency.
- I don't do my makeup until I get to work.
- Nice!
- I think I got the shit end of the bargain.
Your morning is just harder in every way.
I don't know how I'm gonna, I may just die.
(fast-paced percussive music)
- I don't really know why I would use coconut oil.
I think I have pretty good oral hygiene already.
- I just pulled in to my 6:10 a.m. class.
(fast-paced electronic music)
It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.
It was like I was too tired to feel tired,
if that makes any sense.
- I didn't look up how much coconut oil
I was supposed to put in my mouth,
but here we go, this is what it looks like.
That looks really, really gross.
(mumbles)
- Got my bag of chips, soda.
It's crazy to me to think that eating junk food
right after working out is like part of her routine,
but it's kinda satisfying.
So Jen left me a little surprise: makeup.
Blush, am I supposed to wet this?
This is something I never even noticed,
so I don't really know what I'm trying to replicate here.
Okay.
Holy shit, that's a lot.
You do like a dab dab dab.
I look like a Bond villain right now.
- It didn't taste that bad, kinda liked it.
- Okay, now we've got liner.
She put "above lashes."
(bleep) was I supposed to?
- I'm gonna brush my teeth because it was really sweet.
My mom taught me that if you eat anything sugar,
you've gotta brush your teeth.
- So I missed, where's like the magic makeup eraser?
That's what I need right now.
(upbeat country music)
- I was surprised with how thick coconut oil is.
- It gets thicker 'cause it's like takin' up the toxins
from your mouth. - [Man] Really?
- [Woman] Yeah! - [Man] Okay, I had no idea
what I was doing with that thing.
It was delicious, though.
- When I first saw him, I couldn't stop laughing.
- I just felt ashamed and embarrassed
walking out of the bathroom.
She was waiting
for me. - [Woman] Steve was like,
"Do not look at me."
- I tried to write an e-mail for work
and it just was like, this is gibberish.
And soon I had to take a nap, at like 9:15.
- The amount of time I had to do everything
was really satisfying.
- I think that there's definitely something
I've learned from this, where there's like
other good things you can extract
from other people's routines.
Like, for instance, the coconut oil seems like a good thing.
- That is a huge concession, because he hated
that coconut oil.
- Well, I hate it 'cause I can't talk to Sophia
so here's the solution: We do it at the same time.
- It's definitely a weird feeling to just like
start eating junk food immediately after like having
one of the hardest workouts of your life.
But it was also really satisfying too.