- Don't say anything offensive
and be on your best behavior.
Joke about how we shouldn't talk about politics
because I know how you can get.
- Yeah, joke about how I should just run
because I'm not ready for this.
I'm not ready for this.
- Oh, my gosh!
Got a little fatter than we remember.
- Appearing normal, trying to hide the
pain of knowing you've slept with my daughter.
Snap judgement based on the handshake.
Stereotyping you based on your wardrobe
and your hairstyle.
Inviting words!
(intense music)
- I have never tried to mind
my manners this much in my entire life.
- Questioning something that Kelsey put
on Facebook that makes me realize
how much I know about you.
- Embarrassment!
- And clearly I'm so supportive of it.
- Yeah, extrapolating on that because it shows
some very good.
- I don't care.
Can I get some information about your background?
I would like to know about your family,
about your job.
I need to find out whether we match up.
- Oh, that reminds me of
something you have to do with your car.
- Aggravated short response.
- Oh, and I'm reminded of a bill I paid of yours.
Oh boy, I'll say anything that
comes into my head.
- Feeling like I'm in high school again.
- Avoiding any form of internal conflict
in order to summarize positive
things about my upbringing.
Specific details in order to make
my middle class family feel as
affluent as I assume yours is.
- That phrase reminds me of something,
oh my God that Kelsey did when she was little.
I was so so so impressed by her.
- Acting on emotions that I haven't
felt since I lived here.
Directing it towards you.
- First impressions are so important
I just don't wanna be negative.
- Reverting back to my high school self.
- I don't need you in the kitchen.
- Abandoning you.
- Are you the type of person
who likes talking about themselves?
- No, I have one or two interest but
my goal here is to find out.
- Desperately trying to connect to you
on one of those interests.
- Pretending to believe your attempt.
And I'll call your bluff.
- I will actually surprise myself
by how well I'm currently backtracking.
- So, you like the same things I do.
- Definitely like.
- I planned this whole dinner out
meticulously and now I'm stressed out
because it didn't work out according to plan.
- Changing the subject to what chores
you want me to do because I'm
continuing this contemptuous relationship
that we use to have when I was 15.
- And I'm trying to stop that.
I just want to remind you about
how much fun we have.
I love you.
It's just a general question because
I'm worried about your well being.
- So boring you with slides of
one of my best moments because,
well, you're basically forced to watch.
- Over emphasizing how interesting this is.
- Oh, and claiming a story as mine
even though it actually happened to a friend.
(laughing)
- Repeating small phrases while nodding.
- Oh, and showing you that.
Hiding that I'm having computer
problems because of pride.
- Oh, your making a very simple mistake
that anyone from my generation
could help you with.
- Excuse about other people using the computer.
And messing with my stuff.
- Actually, very, very
simple thing that everyone knows presented
like it's an insider's secret.
- Snap judgement.
That my other snap judgements were wrong.
- Taking a breath.
Becoming an adult again.
- Look I can't hide that I'm
unsure about your dreams.
And you look a little fatter!
- Mom!
- I'm so sorry.
Oh, there I go again.
- Stomping around because the
way we communicate is symptomatic
of a much larger issue.
- I approve of your choices but I value security.
- Pretending I don't want attention right now.
- I'm passively siding with your mom
because them liking me is much more important
than whatever you're arguing about.
- I'm finally feeling needed.
- Understanding why I'm being
ganged up on right now and
willing to go along with the plan.
- I am impressed with how you
handled the situation.
And you can begin to let your guard down, slowly,
over the course of the next five years.