- Have you ever been on a date in Chipotle?
- We had margs.
- Alright. - Chips and guac,
and burritos.
- You fell-- - We did not have sex
afterwards, though.
(laughs) - Oh yeah, no.
No one has sex after Chipotle.
(upbeat music) (creaking)
- I love Chipotle so much.
I (beep) love it.
- I love Chipotle.
Like Oprah loves bread,
my ass loves Chipotle.
- I could eat Chipotle every day,
and I have done that for weeks before.
- I hope these will be good.
It already smells delicious.
- It already smells like classic Chipotle smell.
(upbeat music)
- [Blonde Woman] Do we?
(beep)
Okay. - Me.
- Oh, I have been craving a burrito so badly.
- No, there's a layer of cheese.
- Where?
- On the whole outside.
- There's rice.
There's steak. - There's a lot of rice.
- You guys out there, so smart.
- Holy (beep).
- I got it up my nose.
- I like the cheesiness around it.
That's kinda cool. - Yeah.
- This shit is so damn good.
- This is a delicious combination.
Who the (beep) ordered this.
(beep) Great.
- This is the burrito that you'd eat
and then like you'd just feel like--
- Full. - You're gonna birth
that burrito later.
- This tastes like normal Chipotle.
- I feel like it's more just like the knowledge
that you're getting extra cheese.
Feel a bit naughty.
- Nachos?
- This isn't real.
- Nachos?
- They're not supposed to do this.
- You wanna talk about beauty,
it's my girlfriend and this dish right here.
- I mean, this is so basic.
Why would I eat chips
at Chipotle? - That might be why I like it.
- Brilliant.
- It's good.
I like it.
- Delicious, yes.
Practical, nah.
- It's pretty standard nachos,
but I do like the combination.
- I fee like I need a gallon of water, though.
- Mhm.
- It's really salty.
(playful music)
What is this little nugget? - Ooh.
What in the world is this?
I have never seen anything
this shape at Chipotle. - Is it a corn on the cob?
- Anytime you put something in a foil,
it's always like - Oh, okay.
- A damn surprise.
- Oh, okay.
- Tacos.
- Oh, it is a double taco. - It's a double taco.
(beeps)
- It's lettuce.
(laughs) I hate this lettuce.
- Oh, and there's look,
there's a layer of cheese
in between the tortillas. - Oh.
- The Chipotle secret menu
is apparently just adding cheese to things.
- I think I'm kinda lactose intolerant,
so this is gonna be an interesting day.
- It's like the bread is not the best part.
It's pretty good.
- You mean tortilla?
- Yeah, the tortilla.
- I think I'm just eating cheese,
but I like it.
- Too much cheese.
Too bready.
- Lots of cheese,
I'm not gonna be able to poop
later. - Love.
- A sad person would make this.
- Yeah.
It's like a break-up food.
- If this was melted,
and a layer of the hot salsa.
- Yes.
- Melted on to it,
so it was an actual quesadilla.
- Yes. - Now, that would be golden.
(upbeat music)
- That queso-burrito, though.
Genius.
- I like that, yeah.
That was very innovative.
- Yeah.
- I told y'all I like Chipotle
in my email. - Yeah, bring your next
date to a Chipotle.
See how that goes.
- Chipotle is delicious--
- Yeah. - And that
should not be understated.
- I wish Chipotle was a man.
- Oh. - I'd (beep) him.
Like (groans).
(laughs) I'm Chipotle.
Eat me.