Cheerilee: OK children, I'm out of therapy now, and the doctor says I should be fine, as long as I avoid too much stress. OK.
And so that's why today, instead of doing our normal classes, we're going to talk about something nice and fun. Cutie Marks! Yay...
Twist: Shouldn't we be learning things like maths or writing, you know, things that might be useful when we want to get a job one day.
This school is going down the crapper. Someone should burn it down...
AB: Don't worry, Twist, I've got an idea.
Diamond Tiara: Applebloom just doesn't want to learn about cutie marks cause she doesn't have one.
(laughter at small child)
T: You're not still mad at me for laughing at you when everyone else was are you?
AB: You were laughing too? Aww.
DT: Applebloom, who do you keep talking to?
AB: I'm talking to Twist. Why can't you see her? She's right there.
Silver Spoon: There's no one there, silly.
DT: Applebloom's mind is totally blank, just like her flank!
(laugher again)
T: You know, you could always just kill them. No one would have to know.
AB: Yeah, maybe... maybe tomorrow.
T: You should never be afraid to hurt more ponies, Applebloom, it's good for you.
AB: I guess I'll think about it. Oy, Applejack.
AJ: Hello there, Applebloom. I little birdie told me someone burned down the schoolhouse this afternoon.
AB: Twist told me to do it.
AJ: And who the heck is Twist?
AB: She's my only friend.
AJ: I think you need more friends then.
AB: No I don't, I need a cutie mark! When am I going to get one? How do I get one?
AJ: Oh, you'll get your cutie mark... when you kill your first pony.
Or when you do pretty much anything else. The whole system's kind of vague, really.
AB: But I want it know!
AJ: DON'T YOU EVER TALK TO YOUR ELDERS LIKE THAT OR I'LL SMACK YOU!
Now, how would you like to go help me sell some apples?
AB: ok....
AJ: Now whatever you, don't get distracted. We're here to make a profit, not make a fool of ourselves.
AB: Oh, it's a celebrity! AJ: Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
AB: Oy, aren't you that Doctor Whooves fellow from the TV show? I love your work!
Time Turner: Oh, well, actually I had to change my name because of copyright, you know.
AB: What is it now then?
TT: You can call me Time Turner.
AB: Oh, kind of like Timmy Turner from that other cartoon?
TT: Oh, damn it!
AJ: Oy, Applebloom, I told you to be selling apples! Get back to work!
AB: Course I can't do it! Just you watch. Here, you, give me money for all these apples.
AJ: No! Not Bon Bon! AB: What? Why not?
Bon Bon: (garble nonsense)
AJ: I'm so sorry Ms. Bon Bon. Won't happen again Ms. Bon Bon. She's new. So sorry about that.
AB: I don't get it. Why was she so angry at me and yelling so crazily like that?
AJ: Oh, she's one of the feminists. You're better off steering clear from her.
In fact you may want to lay low for a while. I know where you can go!
AB: Oy, Rainbow Dash, you want to hang out for a while?
RD: Like, OMC YES! This is so weird, no one ever wants to hang out with me.
AB: Yeah, I was kind of counting on that.
RD: We're going to have so much fun together.
RD: Wait, hang on. I just remembered we already did that.
AB: Oh, this is so boring!
RD: Well, if you want we could go to that party instead. It looks kind of bad, but we could go there anyway.
AB: What party?
RD: Like, you know, Diamond Tiara's one.
AB: Oh, crap, I forgot! Got to go.
RD: O... OK then! I'll just be here on my own. On my own again. Just like every other freaking day.
Ah, I freaking hate it when that happens.
AB: Oy, Twist!
T: Ah, Applebloom. I heard about the schoolhouse; very well done.
AB: No time for that! There's a party, remember? I can't got alone, I can't be the only blank flank!
T: I'm sorry Applebloom, but I can not go with you. You see... I'm just a figment of your imagination.
AB: First I had to hang out with Rainbow Dash, and now this! This is the worst day of my life.
DT: Heh! Well if it isn't loser McLoser Pants!
AB: Hah! The joke's on you, I'm wearing a dress.
DT: What are you talking about? No you're not.
AB: Oh, don't tell me that that was imaginary too.
DT: If I only get one birthday wish today, I hope it's that everyone laughs at you. Ready?
(laughter? again? really?)
DT: What was that?
DT: Your voice is so stupid, I can't understand a word you're saying!
Sweetie Belle: She said your mom's in the basement getting drunk with thirty other stallions.
DT: Oh, damn it, not again! Come on, Silver Spoon, let's go.
SS: I wish I had a personality.
AB: Thanks for helping me out there. Oh, hey! You're blank flanks too!
SB: That's a rude way of introducing yourself.
AB: Oh, sorry. I'm Applebloom.
SB: Sweetie Belle.
AB: We should form a secret club now that we're friends.
AB: Oh, come on. It'll be fun.
SB: Well my band just did kick me out. May as well.
AB: What should we call ourselves?
SB: Black Death Fire Doom!
SB: Gory Black Blood Mansion!
SB: Ancient Fires Of The Eternal Chasm!
AB: Well you two are quite clearly insane. I'll come up with a name later.
SB: I still like my Blood Chasm idea.
AB: Why, we try to get our cutie marks of course!
SB: Yay. I'm as happy as a school girl.
AB: Oh, don't worry. I've got an idea.
PC: Oh, well I'll be. A letter from one of my subjects.
Dear Princess Celestia, we have kidnapped Luna. Give us a thousand bits or you will never see her again.
Oh, they didn't think that through!
AB: How about the Cutie Mark Crusaders!
SB: The Crusades were the most violent, depraved, torturous, and brutal times in all history.
I freaking love it!